a year of getting back in touch.

act one: me
act two: you
act three: everything else

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

Act I Scene II Conclusion

Connecting with my mind seemed like a natural step after connecting with my body - the transition seemed natural and easy. The first few weeks I really felt like I was deepening my self-awareness, especially through meditation and reading the yogic texts.

The four cups exercise also brought my attention to the idea of intention. It changed my perspective on each and every action for the first few days. I really thought about how all of my decisions would affect each other, myself, those around me, and my state of mind.

This directly influenced my levels of stress and happiness. I could avoid virtually all stress by gauging how my reaction would alter my environment and my mental state. Conversely, approaching each day with the intent to make myself happy (or rather fulfilled, through filling my four cups, the achievement of which would result in elevated levels of happiness) directly influenced my actions as well. I went out of my way to find fulfilling activities, and this upped my happiness in a big way.

The reading of books and poems was mostly for pleasure, with my ultimate aim to open my mind intellectually, to inspire me with literature I wasn't yet acquainted with. Honestly, I didn't read all that I wanted to, and what I did read wasn't exactly what one might call intellectual. The journaling on paper was a total failure, although I did manage to post a few poems that touched me on this forum, and managed to post more often that I normally would.

All in all, the first half of the month was amazing. I could really feel my comprehension of myself deepening, and with it the knowledge that I barely know myself at all, and certainly don't know my limits (in all senses of the word). I would have like to have dug deeper still, had the chaos of life and family not derailed me for the last two weeks.

That being said, circumstances have led me to change the order of the next two months. We are moving at the end of March, meaning we will have to do deep cleaning (part of my intention for the Serious month) twice in the next month. We also need to complete our taxes before April 15, which was originally the start date of the Serious month, although I see it as falling into the serious category. That being said, I have decided to change the third month to Serious, and the fourth month will then come back to the self trilogy and conclude with Soul & Spirit.

On the eve of the start of the third month, I have mixed feelings. Cleaning and serious business are not my favorite things in the world, but there are certain tasks I have been putting off for months (or years even in some cases) that I will be very relieved to finally check off my list.

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